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<title>Tell Me Why (I Look Back And I Wanna Cry) by CasGetYourShotgun</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25019830">Tell Me Why (I Look Back And I Wanna Cry)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/CasGetYourShotgun/pseuds/CasGetYourShotgun'>CasGetYourShotgun</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Pacific Rim Summer Bingo 2020 [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Pacific Rim (Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Adopted Sibling Relationship, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen, Growing Up, Hugs, Post-Movie: Pacific Rim (2013), Siblings, the title sounds sad but i promise this isn't more angst, uprising don't interact</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 06:54:19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>502</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25019830</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/CasGetYourShotgun/pseuds/CasGetYourShotgun</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Amara Namani doesn't have many memories of her birth parents or adoptive father. But she does have her siblings.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Amara Namani &amp; Jake Pentecost, Amara Namani &amp; Raleigh Becket, Mako Mori &amp; Amara Namani, Mako Mori &amp; Jake Pentecost, Mako Mori &amp; Jake Pentecost &amp; Amara Namani, Raleigh Becket/Mako Mori</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Pacific Rim Summer Bingo 2020 [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1779406</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Pacific Rim Bingo 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Tell Me Why (I Look Back And I Wanna Cry)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This wasn't beta-read, because somehow it ended up being too personal to me, in spite of my circumstances being nothing like Amara's. </p><p>Written for the Hugs square of my PacRim Bingo card.</p><p>The title is from Owl City's 'Firebird'.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Amara Namani has a photograph of herself with her birth family in one of the cardboard boxes she's using to transport her stuff into her dorm. She doesn't remember them as well as she wishes she could. </span>
</p><p>
  <span>She doesn't remember Stacker Pentecost very clearly either. She knows he'd worked to save the world, that he raised Mako and Jake, and that he'd adopted her after she lost her parents, but he hadn't lived much longer after that. She has a picture of him with the three of them too.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The family she remembers properly is the one she has now - Mako and her now-husband had taken her and Jake in afterwards. They'd both only been in their twenties, too young to be responsible for a teenage boy and a traumatised girl, but they'd done a wonderful job. They'd each lost so much of their families, but they'd pieced together a new one from the wreckage, small and broken but theirs.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Amara credits Mako with sparking her love for engineering, a love that had taken her all the way to college. Jake has always struggled to keep focused on any one interest, but Amara could listen to her sister discuss Jaeger tech for hours. She wants to take things apart to find out how they work. She wants to design and build machinery that could change the world. And she's going to do it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Raleigh had driven them up in the same truck he'd taken her and Jake to school in. Jake had moved out years ago, but he'd come home in time to help Amara take her first steps into life as a college student, and she was glad to have him there.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>The four of them made the drive from rural Alaska together, and it hurts Amara more than she expects it to when she realises she won't be returning with them for some time.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>After they've managed to get her side of the dorm vaguely liveable, they go out for one last meal together, and that's when Amara breaks.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>She's excited, really she is, she's been looking forward to this, but she'll be away from them all for months and the comforting feeling of their arms around her almost make it worse because she'll miss them so much, and so she holds on as tight as she can and cries, not caring that she's in public.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>"Are you going to be okay, kiddo?" asks Raleigh later, as he's about to leave, after Mako has given her the tightest hug she can remember receiving and Jake had messed up her hair for the last time in a while.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>And in spite of her mixed feelings, she knows the answer.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>There's a picture of the four of them tacked next to the others on her corkboard, and a poster of Lady Danger above her bed, and the three people she loves most in the world are only a phone call away if she needs them.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>"Yeah," says Amara, "yeah, I will be."</span>
</p>
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